Every one of us, consciously or unconsciously, affects the
objects and people around us, including ourselves, on a continual basis. Think
about the expression 'laughter is contagious.' Well, sure it is! How do you feel when you
are around happy, laughing people? Usually, you cant help but feel good
yourself right?. All emotions are energy and energy passes from one body to another;
from one object to another; matter to matter. Laughter is contagious!
You clear your house of negative energies and replace them
with positive ones. Laugh once in a while. Promise. It'll help. :)
For my younger bro.. all the love!
Posted 01/27/06. Again, part of my writing shenanigans from an old blog during junior high. T'was our prom year, and our school's official organ, The Lazzette, had an editorial article on "How to ask a Girl for a Prom Date." Yeah, it sucked major shitballs and it bored the hell out of me. Also, it ruins the reputation of lasallians as good female woo-ers :) kidding! The author of the article is a self-pronounced Mr. Playboy-that-can-entice-every-freaking-high-scool-girl-around but he himself bluffs around women. Sheeesh. I'm not surprised none from our batch took his advices and they might be as well dumped first-hand. Anyway, the article sparked a creative fuse and I thought, why not reverse it? I mean, why not make the GIRL ask us(boys) for prom?
---
As lasallian gentlemen *cough* bullshit *cough*, we fear only three things: our mom's nagging, mr. medroso, and getting our girlfriend pregnant. This makes the high school prom a conglomeration of our primal fears, yet something of a rite of passage for young men. There are many things that can go wrong in the planning phases. In fact, way too many things. What if, by asking out one girl, you piss off another, more attractive girl? What if prom with this girl is no fun because no one else likes her? What if the suit you picked out doesn't match her stupid bitch ass dress?
1. picking the right girl In order for this love-heist to work, you need to pick a girl who A.) hasn't gotten asked yet, and B.) who you can convince to really like you. Stay within neighboring cliques, but don't go for the teen-movie "She's All That" type of chick with glasses and a ponytail. She doesn't have the self-confidence, anyhow. You need a strong woman who will take initiative, and as I relearn after watching Erin Brokovich a dozen times, strong women with initiative are the best.
2. walk the talk If a girl were to hint that you should ask her out, she would leisurely drop hints about how she does not have a prom date and how she just does not know what to do. You have to do this, but instead of coming off helpless, be a complete loser. What you say to her should be along the lines of "Yeah, I want to go to prom, but I'm just trying to narrow it down to one of your friends." or "I want to go to prom, but I don't want to settle for anyone else other than..." leave a blank and that'll do it for sure. Don't bite the bait and by showing confidence and standards, she knows you are a man of conviction, which they surely like.
3. ownage/pwnage Now, if you really like this girl, you will no doubt want to destroy the chances of anyone else having a chance with her. Since she might have other suitors, make sure they know they are your bitch. Set their shit straight like Watergate through a combination of violence and intimidation, which I like to call "Viole-dation." Send warnings, break fingers, whatever you need to do to tell the suitors that this girl is the passive-aggressive world to you. And it's sweet for a girl right?
4. finally.. After all of her possible suitors get systematically taken out, she will begin to think that maybe everyone that would possibly ask her to prom is in the hospital. She is right. Tell her this, and then respond truthfully when she asks if you have a date yet. Observe how it all falls into place, and how much genius you must posses.While it may be sociopathic, you cannot argue with the results. She's happy because she has a date, and you're happy because you are now on your way to the rest of your life.
Oh, don't forget to bring your Johnnies alright? Enjoy!
--- Note: The video above is not our batch, I would just like to show how we, lasallians, prepare and cram everything from scratch to the big day for our prom night. Big shoutout to Denise Mangubat for being my date for the night. In case you haven’t noticed, I’ve been a bit absent, my recent entries are composed of 're-posts' from my old blogs. I just finished my last final, which puts an end to long and stressful period of wacky craziness. However, it will still be a little bit before I dive back into blogging: I’m leaving for 12-hour hospitial clinicals for roughly a week or so. Anyway, hold tight and I should have some good stories to share when I get back. Summer term starts next week. Can't wait to go back to school! :)
disclaimer
Spelling error and poor grammar in this blog are the product of a poor school system.
This blog is intended for the use of the individual
user named above and may contain information that is
confidential, privileged or unsuitable for overly sensitive
persons with low self-esteem, no sense of humour or irrational
religious beliefs. My opinions are neither copyrighted nor trademarked,
and it's price competitive. If you like, I'll trade for one of yours.
None of the ideas expressed in this blog are actually mine, they are told to me
by Luthor and Ferdinand, the five inch tall space aliens who live under my
desk. In return for these ideas, I have given them permission to eat any dust
bunnies they may find under there. The rants written herein do not conform to
my views or to any accepted standard of logic that the Greeks thought up.
Unless the word 'absquatulation' has been used in its correct context somewhere
other than in this warning, it does not have any legal or grammatical use
and may be ignored. No animals were harmed in the transmission of this blog,
although the golden retriever next door is living on borrowed time. Those of
you with an overwhelming fear of the unknown will be gratified to learn that
there is no hidden message revealed by reading this warning backwards,
so just ignore that Alert Notice from the conscience behind your head. If
you have come to this blog in error, please add some nutmeg and egg whites
and place it in a warm oven for 40 minutes. Whisk briefly and let it stand
for 2 hours before icing.
Have fun! :)
all the love,
jesma
Monday, May 26, 2008
getting a girl to ask you for prom.
Posted 01/27/06. Again, part of my writing shenanigans from an old blog during junior high. T'was our prom year, and our school's official organ, The Lazzette, had an editorial article on "How to ask a Girl for a Prom Date." Yeah, it sucked major shitballs and it bored the hell out of me. Also, it ruins the reputation of lasallians as good female woo-ers :) kidding! The author of the article is a self-pronounced Mr. Playboy-that-can-entice-every-freaking-high-scool-girl-around but he himself bluffs around women. Sheeesh. I'm not surprised none from our batch took his advices and they might be as well dumped first-hand. Anyway, the article sparked a creative fuse and I thought, why not reverse it? I mean, why not make the GIRL ask us(boys) for prom?
---
As lasallian gentlemen *cough* bullshit *cough*, we fear only three things: our mom's nagging, mr. medroso, and getting our girlfriend pregnant. This makes the high school prom a conglomeration of our primal fears, yet something of a rite of passage for young men. There are many things that can go wrong in the planning phases. In fact, way too many things. What if, by asking out one girl, you piss off another, more attractive girl? What if prom with this girl is no fun because no one else likes her? What if the suit you picked out doesn't match her stupid bitch ass dress?
1. picking the right girl In order for this love-heist to work, you need to pick a girl who A.) hasn't gotten asked yet, and B.) who you can convince to really like you. Stay within neighboring cliques, but don't go for the teen-movie "She's All That" type of chick with glasses and a ponytail. She doesn't have the self-confidence, anyhow. You need a strong woman who will take initiative, and as I relearn after watching Erin Brokovich a dozen times, strong women with initiative are the best.
2. walk the talk If a girl were to hint that you should ask her out, she would leisurely drop hints about how she does not have a prom date and how she just does not know what to do. You have to do this, but instead of coming off helpless, be a complete loser. What you say to her should be along the lines of "Yeah, I want to go to prom, but I'm just trying to narrow it down to one of your friends." or "I want to go to prom, but I don't want to settle for anyone else other than..." leave a blank and that'll do it for sure. Don't bite the bait and by showing confidence and standards, she knows you are a man of conviction, which they surely like.
3. ownage/pwnage Now, if you really like this girl, you will no doubt want to destroy the chances of anyone else having a chance with her. Since she might have other suitors, make sure they know they are your bitch. Set their shit straight like Watergate through a combination of violence and intimidation, which I like to call "Viole-dation." Send warnings, break fingers, whatever you need to do to tell the suitors that this girl is the passive-aggressive world to you. And it's sweet for a girl right?
4. finally.. After all of her possible suitors get systematically taken out, she will begin to think that maybe everyone that would possibly ask her to prom is in the hospital. She is right. Tell her this, and then respond truthfully when she asks if you have a date yet. Observe how it all falls into place, and how much genius you must posses.While it may be sociopathic, you cannot argue with the results. She's happy because she has a date, and you're happy because you are now on your way to the rest of your life.
Oh, don't forget to bring your Johnnies alright? Enjoy!
--- Note: The video above is not our batch, I would just like to show how we, lasallians, prepare and cram everything from scratch to the big day for our prom night. Big shoutout to Denise Mangubat for being my date for the night. In case you haven’t noticed, I’ve been a bit absent, my recent entries are composed of 're-posts' from my old blogs. I just finished my last final, which puts an end to long and stressful period of wacky craziness. However, it will still be a little bit before I dive back into blogging: I’m leaving for 12-hour hospitial clinicals for roughly a week or so. Anyway, hold tight and I should have some good stories to share when I get back. Summer term starts next week. Can't wait to go back to school! :)
c
"Not by wrath does one kill, but by laughter"
-Friedrich Nietzche
it has been crazy five years full of cracky, non-sense and whimsical humor blogging.
what started out as a "for-profit" racket of a graduating elementary student (which he really
didn't need) turned out to be one of his hidden passions -- writing. truly, writing is the world's
most favorite metaphor, and sharing it, broadens the adventure to begin with. rudyard kipling once
qouted, "words are the most powerful drug used by mankind" if that was so, i am due for rehabiliatation
just to get over with the addiction. the pen is the tongue of the mind so let your mind speak, and write it
down; for words are so many things, and a small drop of ink, falling like dew upon a thought, produces
that which makes thousands, perhaps millions.
theverybestofjessiemaria[dot]com, jesma's current and 4th blog, and possibly his last will be a hopefully
collection of his best hits since he started blogging in 2003. a frustrated novelist, he is currently studying
in Portsmouth, UK, struggling through his first year at University as a Eng'g Physics Nursing major. He
hopes to find some success in writing so as to soften the blow when telling his parents how much he is flunking
the course they would be funding for the next five years.
As a seasoned interweb dork, Jesma's diet consists mostly of a steady supply of energy drinks and
Cool Ranch Doritos. Because of this, Jesma must supplement his diet with a steady source of positive
feedback in order to survive. You can contribute to Jesma's continued existence by either leaving a
comment or by sending him an email at rossiyskaya_federatsiya@yahoo.com
an essay to the ateneo de manila's admissions personal essay requirement. the question was:
Are there any siginificant accomplishments you have realized, that helped defined you as a person?
-- I am a dynamic figure, often seen scaling walls and crushing ice. I have been known to remodel train
stations on my free time, making them more efficient in the area of heat retention. I translate ethnic
slurs for Cuban refugees, I write award-winning operas, I manage time efficiently.
Occasionally, I tread water for three days in a row. I woo women with my sensuous and godlike trombone
playing. I can pilot bicycles up severe inclines with unflagging speed, and I cook 30-minute brownies in
20 minutes.
I am an expert in snakes n' ladders, a veteran in love, and an outlaw in Peru. Using only a hoe and a large glass
of water, I once single-handedly defended a small village in the Amazon basin from a horde of ferocious
army ants. I play bluegrass cello. I was scouted by the Mets. I am the subject of numerous documentaries.
When I'm bored, I build large suspension bridges in my yard. I enjoy urban hang gliding. On Wednesdays,
after school, I repair electrical appliances free of charge.
I am a private citizen, yet I receive fan mail. I have been caller number nine and have won the weekend
passes. Last summer I toured around the whole world traveling with centrifugal force demonstration. My
deft floral arrangements have earned me fame in international botany circles.
I can hurl tennis rackets at small moving objects with deadly accuracy. I once read Paradise lost, Moby Dick,
and The Odeyssey in one day and still had time to refurbish an entire dining room that evening. I know the
exact location of every food item in the supermarket. I have performed several covert operations for the CIA.
I sleep once a week; when I do sleep, I sleep in a chair. While on vacation in Canada, I successfully negotiated
with a group of terrorists who had seized a small bakery. The laws of physics do not apply to me.
I balance, I weave, I dodge, I frolic, and my bills are all paid. On weekends, to let off steam, I participate
in full-contact origami. Years ago I discovered the meaning of life, but forgot to write it down. I have made
extraordinary four course meals using only a mouli and a toaster oven.
I breed prize-winning dandelions. I have won bullfights in San Juan, cliff-diving competitions in Sri Lanka,
and spelling bees at the Kremlin. I have played with Cirque du Soleil, I have performed open-heart surgery, and I have spoken
with Elvis.